to my first n last n future boy/girl-friend
dear honeybun,
hi babe. my lil snugglebug. my sugarplum. my butterbean. my puka baby. my fuwa fuwa. my sweet thing. my little moon. my favorite boy/girl. my pompom. my honeycloud. my cinnamon roll. my soy milk. my bubba. my love.
this is a letter i am sending u into the future. lately i hve been feeling so guilty abt the kinds of stuff i post online bc i feel like u might not approve of it. maybe im too open abt some things tht u would have wanted me to keep just between us. maybe u wanted me to keep my online confessions more private so we could save more of our firsts for when we finally get together. i get it, bc i would love for u to save all ur firsts for me too.
i wanted to make this letter so tht when u read it, it’ll be the first time u find out abt my neutralhoneymilkers alias. if u actually found me through this alias then u can ignore this part n just laugh at me lol.
i wanna confess to u through this letter tht i hve been making some unhinged n hypersexual posts online under my alias. pls dont break up w me in ur head just yet !!! i want this letter to be a confession not just of what i post, but of how much u already mean to me, even tho ur not real to me yet. with each post i still think abt u, however imaginary n fictional u are right now. in my mind i dedicate my posts only to u, my love, n i hope u realise tht this doesnt mean i belong to everyone on the internet ,, it means everyone on the internet just gets to see how much i want u in my life. i post solely for u.
i wnted to write this letter in my blog for everyone to see, so tht everyone knows tht once im urs, im gnna be urs forever n ever n ever. if u want me to stop making these posts, i will. once u become real to me, n once i finally get to hold ur hand, the first thing i will do is tell u all about this. im just so guilty about all of this sometimes. sometimes i just want to stop and delete everything bc i feel like im doing a disservice to u.
i love u pookie bear, n i hope u can find it in ur heart to forgive me. ill be writing more letters to u in this blog from now on as i wait patiently for u.
from ur future girlfriend,
naoko
p.s. all ive been thinking about lately is how ill be slow waltzing with u in our kitchen to this song.
please come to me soon.